By Hannah Bansen
Go ahead and wire me
all of the instructions you could possibly require me
‘cause it’s better not to lose
all the energy and empathy you fought so hard to fuse
to the rafters
the hardest real disaster,
B’with all the pain that I’ve been through, don’t be surprised I shatter
from a cast
made of semi-sturdy mass,
Though I tried so hard to leave the things that passed in the past.
So I’m stretching,
feeling somewhat like a fledgling,
gripping self-worth and emotions ’til tight insides feel like retching.
But not useless.
And even though I knew this,
Sometimes the silence shouts and then it’s all I can to do this:
To breathe in,
remember what I care about,
And after all is said and done my actions speak my whereabouts.
it feels like an extension
of all my uncertainty that holds me in suspension.)
So find me,
Or watch my back behind me,
B’no matter what you get I hope you never lose the kind me,
I’m still hopin’
for a sign, a word, a token,
for something straight from you that proves you didn’t stop your stokin’
of my flame,
still too tame,
Lukewarm water’s not the same,
But it’s not your fault, I know you gave your all. Must be my blame
for my lost
sense of cost,
for the dreams I put on frost,
for my withering initiative that’s bending ’til it’s crossed
And I’m trying to save face,
But I just can’t seem to ground myself or shake feeling displaced.
Yet I find
that my mind
doesn’t always speak unblind,
That there’s more to all this craziness that I have yet to find,
like a prism,
bends the bars of this mind prison,
So colors cut from truth light up my search for what broken isn’t.